Wednesday, 30 October 2013

What Alice Munro’s Nobel Win Means for Canadian Literature

The announcement of Alice Munro’s Nobel Prize in Literature came to many of us with a sense of relief. There is a mysticism to the award that draws frustrated anticipation each year; will the prize be awarded based on works judged for their politics, or merit? Will the committee reward the prize to a contender they regret having missed in the past (as was Tomas Tranströmer), or attempt to boost a young reputation (as William Faulkner)? Were the bookies betting on the prize too influential in the decision? Could the critics of our nation do anything more to promote or package the international reputation of our authors? Is our publishing apparatus to blame? The prize this year, however, can only be accepted with wide gratitude from all Canadians.

Alice Munro has had a long career, and a generous one. She is an author who has worked tirelessly as a Canadian Literary artist, and to the furthering of Canadian Literature. She is often compared to Chekhov, but such a comparison could easily muffle the originality of her art. She cannot be accused of conforming her work to that of European or even American models. Her work is all her own, and has the courage to model itself according to nothing but it’s subject. And her subject too is a bold choice; the workings of men and women under the pains and joys of ordinary life.  She understands our manners, but she does not spare us the irony of them. She is not a sentimentalist nor fatalist; for so many characters, their failings and successes are their own, and their lives often open maps for their very hearts. She has been an early champion of many Canadian literary artists before their time: early editions of Anne Carson’s and Jane Urquhart’s novels bear a few dubious reviews, with her name appearing the most prominent and opinion the clearest.

The question about where to start reading Alice Munro’s work could not be easier to answer, as there is hardly a bad place to start. Her stories operate well in or out of their original collections; a selection on the market will do, as will a list of the best collections. Runaway and The View from Castle Rock have been out for less than a decade, and they have not ceased to foster new conversation in the best of literary circles. Her earlier collections may be capped by Open Secrets, The Love of a Good Woman, Friend of my Youth, and Something I’ve been Meaning to Tell You. The shock of reading any of them is simply how much she is able to squeeze into clear prose of a few pages. Many stories cover wider ranges of time than any novel on the market, but in a few key themes, characters and scenes their effect is almost that of an ancient dramatist.

 In a year of so many frustrations offered to Canadians politically and internationally, there can be little better validation of our fundamental identity than such a remembrance and long-awaited recognition of Alice Munro’s writing.

By Hyperion

Sunday, 6 October 2013

Some Reasons Why a TWU Male Will Not Ask You Out

1.        He’s a coward and lacks the courage to declare his interest in you.
2.        He’s waiting for something explicit to occur from hanging out with you that will make him certain that he should ask you out. However, that explicit occurrence or “moment” will never happen, because he’s shifted his understanding that you’re going to make “the move” which will declare your interest in him. He just flips the effort upside down, which means he’s a coward by passing off male duties onto you.
3.        He’s weighing the pros and cons of being in a relationship with you before declaring himself. There is window lasting a couple days maximum in order for this to occur; after which, he becomes a coward. I mean it’s pretty simple, you either find her attractive enough to date or not.
4.        He’s concerned about his appearance and what other people will think of him at school, which amount to being a vain coward.
5.        He thinks that he has many “options” from going to school here and is waiting for a “better deal”, which amounts to being a vain, arrogant coward.
6.        He realizes that he doesn’t find you attractive enough to ask out, and for some reason, still continues to put himself in situations that make you think he’s still interested without declaring his intentions. He’s a d-bag and a coward.
7.        He’s just leading you on because he feels “big”, since your displays of interest in him make him feel that he has the power to reject you at any moment he wants. He’s just a d-bag, straight up.
8.        He thinks he doesn’t meet your expectations (physically, financially, socially, post-grad plans, etc.). However, if he’s hanging around you, he wouldn’t be around you if he didn’t think he had a chance with you, which makes him a coward.
9.        He’s chosen a celibate life. Chances are slim to none for this one, and slim just left town. This is such a rare occurrence at this school that it’s safe to rule this one out.
10.     He doesn’t want to date while he’s in school in order to focus on his studies. That’s a load of crap; but he’s less of a coward if he actually tells you this (even though he’s lying).
11.     He thinks dating is something far more serious than it is. He’s very naïve, but he’s still trainable.
12.     He may be getting over a past relationship and is feels unstable enough to move on. This does happen sometimes; but considering that most dudes on campus are cowards when it comes to dating in the first place, I’m skeptical that they’ve even had a recent girlfriend.
13.     He’s keeping his focus on God. This is either equivalent to choosing a celibate life or an unclear explanation as to why he doesn’t want to date you, which is a different topic. This foggy reason is basically saying that he’s a coward, since most of us are already trying to focus on God (whatever that means). As if adding a virtuous female ally into his life is going to detract from that!
14.     He’s interested in someone else that you may not know of. If he’s leading you on, then he’s also leading on another girl, which means that he’s a d-bag and a coward for not declaring his interest in either of you.
15.     He’s so stupid that he hasn’t even thought of dating you, yet. His elevator doesn’t go quite to the top.

Girls, I’m assuming that you’ve played your cards right and you’re in a “situation” already. In other words, once you’ve examined yourself, it’s time to look outwards. Most of these reasons are very realistic; one or two not so much. Minimally stated, these reasons are directed towards the males on campus in order to demonstrate why they are cowards when it comes to dating, for the most part. Perhaps a stifling, glass housed, religious environment on campus encourages the reasons I’ve mentioned. For the freshman, the young, and/or the naïve: it’s too early in the year for you to see this clearly.

by Kyle


Tuesday, 16 April 2013

A Gentle Man's Social Theory: The Phénix Memoir

L. Trocinium

The ingredients to a successful shindig are as vast and vibrant as the pantry of an experienced gourmet chef. Having all the right elements within arms reach is not always a recipe for success though (simply reference the LA Lakers 2013 roster or your roommates cooking). In the right season and with a carefully crafted context, bringing a good mix of people together can create a memorable affair. Like any form of art, becoming a master is a process that usually starts with appreciating the tradition. The execution is not necessarily about following a set of rules but more about malleability and the willingness to be a student. Bringing people together for a festive occasion is equal parts art, and science. That being said, here are a few of the idiosyncrasies in cooking up a plan for social gatherings:
      · To show people they are valued, be personal. How many people actually read their Facebook event invitations? The medium is the message for invitations, so hunker down and leave some time for face-to-face invites, phone calls or personalized texts.
      · Celebrate the small victories. When the big ones come along you will then be well versed and know exactly what to do.
      · Expectations will rarely ever equal reality and that is a good thing. Make sure the important details are taken care of, but leave space for the carefully selected variables to unfold on their own. It is a good idea (especially for type-A personalities) to make up some creative contingency plans, beforehand.
      · Try to invite a vast array of personalities, and get outside of the norm. The common experience is more relatable when there are more flavours available.
      · In the I generation of pods, pads, and phones, music is a highly contentious sacred realm for many. Do the best to mitigate this conflict by finding some casual background music, or friends who are musical to play some tunes. This will prevent a night of 45-second song shuffles.
These tidbits might not really be for you. Everyone has different tastes. A master sushi chef is of very little dining relevance to a person who does not like fish. I know some people would rather be drawn and quartered than have the responsibility of being a social facilitator, but I encourage trying to step out and finding the groove that works for you. Just remember, keep an open dialogue, keep honing your tastes and most importantly keep it classy.

Friday, 15 March 2013

An Education on The Bues


M. Fischer


Lightnin’ Hopkins That Woman Named Mary 
 
Howling Wolf Down In The Bottom 
 
Mississippi John HurtTalkin’ Casey 
 
Son House Death Letter 
 
Robert PetwayCatfish Blues
 
Skip JamesThe Devil Got My Woman
 
Blind Willie Johnson Dark Was The Night
 
Blind Willie McTell Just As Well Get Ready, You Got To Die

 

Thursday, 7 February 2013

'Twas the Night Before Midterms


Acoustik Warrior

‘Twas the night before midterms, and all through the pod
Not a person was stirring, it was really quite odd.
Finally able to catch time to sleep
I crashed in my bed, I made not a peep.

My pod-mates all snuggled up, in their respective beds,
Finally sleeping and resting their heads;
My roommate sprawled out, and I curled in a ball,
Had just settled down, to sleep in late and all.

When suddenly in my room their arose such a clatter
That I sprang from my bed to see what was the matter.
The clock read, 8 a.m., it came by so fast
But with no morning classes, I decided to crash.

The comfort of blankets, the warmth of soft pillows
Lulled me back to sleep, steady as she goes 
When what to my slumbering mind should ring clear
But a scampering roommate with nothing to fear.

Brushing teeth, banging boxes, as he rolled out of bed
Lights on, water running—I pretended to be dead.
Curled up and seething, I started to cry,
Resisting the morning, “Why this noise, why?”

And just like he woke, he left in a flash.
I slunk back in my bed, groaning, “more sleep at last,”
When what from his crumple of sheets should ring out
But a loud Chinese ringtone, of who knows what about?

Blankets over my head, I tried to ignore it,
I went to his bed, I tried to restore it,
But since apparently nothing can stop an alarm that’s begun
I greeted the morning, as the chapel bells rung.

Thursday, 6 December 2012

An Advanced Beginners Pipe Smoking Guide (Full Version)


Bowlbro

      Here are the pipe-smoking points and problems that I have learned over my modest 3-4 years in the hobby. I've acquired a fair collection of decent quality pipes, 5 of them, and a modest collection of quality pipe tobaccos to choose from.
      Allow me to start with the wisdom of Yoda: "Do or do not; there is no try." With this in mind, let us set a "doing" budget of around 80-100 dollars. If this is not modest enough for you, then make the sacrifices in quality and be prepared when you encounter some of the common problems beginner pipe smokers face.

Pipe Purchasing:
      Get yourself a half decent pipe. A quality grade pipe that is affordable should cost you somewhere between 50-70 dollars. Pipes get quite a bit more expensive and range into the thousands. Find a pipe that has the looks you desire from a reputable company. My beginner pipe company suggestions are Bjarne, Savinelli, Brebbia, and Peterson. However, I would most strongly recommend a Savinelli. Savs are well made and inspected, even though they are produced in a large quantity, and come in an incredible amount of styles that all have simple ID numbers to customize your preferences. Stay away from "drugstore brand" pipes that cost between 10-30 dollars, such as Dr. Grabow; these pipes are OK, but will not give you the changing experience of a better quality pipe. And no matter what pipe you choose, for your first make sure it is either made of briar or block meerschaum. I recommend briar. Filtered or unfiltered comes down to preference; however, cheaper pipes typically have filters, with the exception of Savinelli's Balsa Filters and Brebbia's Rock Maple Inserts.

BONUS/FRUGAL OPTION:
      It is often recommended that a new pipe smoker start with what is called an "estate pipe," essentially a fancy name for used. Find one in a brand and shape that appeals to you, clean it (look up pipe sweetening treatment online), and you can skip the step of "breaking in" a pipe, that we'll discuss later.

      As Dr. Jay recommended, go and get yourself pipe cleaners and a pipe tool (a three tooled miracle of the Czech's). You'll need 'em.

Tobacco:
      Get yourself a quality tobacco based on your preferences. In Canada, a brand marketed as Mr. B's suffices. They have decent blends and a variety of aromatic tobaccos. Speaking of which, it is mostly recommended that your first pipe smoke should be an "aromatic blend." This means that the tobacco has been sugared and flavoured to smell like cherries, peaches & cream, rum, maple or even chocolate. The aromatic blends are typically easier to start with for one without previous smoking experience in other forms. For the occasional cigar enthusiast, you could start with a blend of straight tobaccos with no additives. These tend to have more general names.

Breaking in:
      Grab your new pipe, your tobacco, and your pipe tool and revel in the experience you will embark upon.
A new pipe generally needs to be "broken in,
the term used to describe smoking a pipe gradually for a while to eliminate the impurities of taste left by residues from the pipes "birth." This process builds a carbon layer called a cake around the inside of your bowl, which protects your pipe against hot embers and gives you a more pleasing smoke. Savinelli pipes come with a coating already on the bowl that essentially eliminates the need for breaking in. Nonetheless, here is the process:
      For your first smoke, pack the bowl about halfway and smoke slowly to the bottom. For your next two to five smokes from that pipe, gradually fill the bowl more and more until you are smoking a full bowl. After you've finished each smoke and you have allowed the pipe to cool down, ream out the majority of the large ash, but leave a little in the bowl, cover the bowl with your palm and shake the left over "dottle" around inside so that it begins to build a cake.

Packing:
      This process is a little bit more dainty and specific; it is also where a lot of beginners problems happen. For a full pack, fill the bowl loosely to the top, and even overflowing a bit, with your tobacco. Take your finger or tamper and press down GENTLY on the tobacco until it sits half full in the bowl. Fill it again and tamp a bit more firmly, until the bowl is around 2/3 full. Fill a third time and press firmly, but not hard, so that the tobacco sits nicely just below the rim and still has a "spring" to it when you press it lightly. If you have not done the process right, DUMP IT OUT AND START OVER. Your pipe will be a pain in your rear if you never master this technique.

Lighting:
      Don't, for the love of holiness, use a lighter. Not only does it make your smoke taste funny for the first few puffs, it also scorches your tobacco and destroys the delicate flavours and scents you want to discover. Use a match: light it, let it burn for a bit, and then slowly rotate the flame around the circumference of your bowl, puffing gently with your mouth, the way you've seen it in the movies, until a button of red appears. At this point, some tobacco may have sprung out. That's ok, this isn't the real deal. Take the flat tamper section of your tool and press out the button of red you just made. That's right, put out your light and do it again the same way. This ensures an even, long lasting burn. Don't get pissed if your pipe doesn't stay lit, it'll go out often. Keep it chill and relight.

Smoking:
      This is the reward for your efforts. Puff gently, taste the tobacco, and KEEP IT SLOW. If you smoke too fast, you smoke too hot and you can burn your tongue and lose the flavours you're looking for. Develop a rhythm that works for you, your pipe, and your blend. Enjoy the taste and the funny sensation. Relax. Depending on your bowl size and smoking speed, this process could take up to an hour, or even more for large pipes.

Cleaning:
      Allow your pipe to cool down for a couple of hours, use the little reamer/spoon tool to scoop out the ash from the bowl. Take a pipe cleaner and run it through the stem (the part you put in your mouth) and shank (the wood part the stem fits in), look into your bowl and see if the pipe cleaner is coming out of the draw hole. Move it back and forth, repeating with more pipe cleaners until they come out clean. Bend the end of a pipe cleaner in half and twizzle it around inside the bowl, picking up the loose, small particles of ash. Take the stem out of the shank and clean up any gunk there. Put the stem back in the shank and allow the pipe to rest for at least 24-36 hours.

Where to buy:
      I use three resources, Sheffield & Sons in Langley, the internet and the U.S.A. Find a reason to go over the border for 48 hours or more and you can bring back a ton of tobacco at ridiculously low prices, in comparison to Canada. I'm all for supporting our own economy, which is why I try to buy my supplies (pipe cleaners, tools, buffing compounds, cigars, humidifier solution, etc) from local businesses, but frankly, I don't care too much for spending $25/ounce for low quality tobacco, when I could get the same amount of premium for $6, 30minutes and a passport flash away.

Discovery:
      Pipe smoking is all about discovery. Finding what blends taste better at different times, in different pipes, with different adult beverages (protip: beer and pipe smoking burns), and with different friends. Explore the world of your palate through the medium of tobacco.